Kidnapped
by Shiro Yuki
Summary: This fic takes place in 1986. Keisuke is 6 and Miaka is 2. That's all I can say, your just gonna have to read it to see what it's all about! :P
1. Priestess in Pampers

Disclaimer: These are so silly to write! I obviously don't own FY in any way! If I did, do you really think I'd waste my time writing fanfics?  I'd be making OVA's like crazy!  They'd introduce a brand new character, Shiro Yuki, who Tasuki would fall in love with.  Then they'd live happily ever after…*anvil falls on Shiro's head, ending this silly delusion*   

Shiro's Notes: Read this before you start reading this fic! Otherwise you will be terribly confused!  This fic takes place in 1986.  Keisuke is 6 years old and Miaka is 2.  If you are not a child of the eighties, or lived in the eighties, you may not know about some of the cartoons mentioned here. Miaka and Keisuke live in Japan, and in this fic they still live in Japan.  I'm not entirely sure they have these cartoons in Japan, but I'm from Canada and don't know what the eighties were like in Japan.  So use your imaginations, all fanfic writers and readers have good ones, and pretend they did!  I really hope you'll like this fic, I'm really excited about it!  I usually write humor fics, but I know I'm capable of a more serious one, BUT NOT ULTRA SERIOUS!  That's just not my style! Please read it! I think you'll like it!       

Chapter One: 

Priestess in Pampers

Narrated By: Keisuke 

"Now you know, and knowing is half the battle!" The man in the TV said at the end of G.I. Joe, my favourite show.

"Wow! Flint is so cool Tetsuya!  When I grow up, I wanna be a G.I Joe like him!"

"Yah! I'd shoot all da baddies with my machine gun!"

My best bud, Tetsuya, started make-believe shooting at the man in the TV.  He's the Jello man, I think his real name is Bill Cosby.

"What's wrong with the Jello man?  I like Jello! It's all wiggley and jiggley!  I think we have some that Mom just made! Want any?"

"…well…I don't like the Jello man, cause he's scary…but I like red Jello!"

"Um…I think it's green…we can pretend it's boogies!"

"Cool!"

Tetsuya and me ran into the kitchen.  Mom's busy trying to clean up Miaka, who's dumped her macaroni in her hair.  She's always busy with stinky Miaka!

"Mom!"

No answer, I'll try again.

"MOM! Me and Tetsi want Jello!"

"Keisuke! Can't you see I'm busy with your sister? Go watch G.I Joe! I'll get you Jello later!"

"But Mom, G.I. Joe is over, and we want Jello now!"

Mom has stopped paying attention to me because Miaka has now taken her apple juice and thrown it at Neko, our cat, who has now stuck her claws to the curtains. I look over at Tetsuya.

"Your Mommy is busy, maybe we should just go play transformers or somethin'." He says heading to the kitchen door in a hurry because Miaka is now aiming a spoonful of applesauce at him.

"NO! I'm sick of being told to wait! G.I. Joe Captain Flint would never have to wait for Jello! He'd just get it himself!"

I head over to the fridge and open the door.  The jello is on the top shelf, which I can just reach.  I grasp the edge of the Jello bowl. It's heavier than I thought it would be, I think it's made of glass. *CRASH*…whoops.

Mom spins around, "KEISUKE!  I told you to wait!  Now look what you've done!  I can't believe this! Look at this mess! Glass all over the place!"  Miaka starts crying because of Mom's yelling.  Mom went over and took her out of her high chair trying to make her stop blubbering.  Just like her to make a situation worse!  "Tetsuya, I think you'd better go home, Keisuke is being punished."

Tetsuya looks very scared and says, "Yes, Ms. Yuki," and runs out the front door.

I thought maybe Mom's lecture was over, no such luck.

"What if the glass had got in your sister's eye?  She could have been blinded for life! You could of hurt Tetsuya!  Don't you even think before you act?  You have to start thinking before you act!" What does that mean? "You're a big brother, and Miaka looks up to you!"

"I HATE MIAKA!  You never pay attention to me anymore!  If G.I. Joe were here, they'd shoot her with their 'chine guns!"

I run into my room and slam the door. 

"You can just stay in there young man!" I hear Mom calling from the kitchen, she sounds real angry, "There will be no dinner for you tonight!"

"I don't care!" I yell.  Just then my tummy rumbles.  I don't care, but I think it does.

Stupid, Miaka!  She's so annoying! Back when it was just Mommy, Daddy and me, I could have Jello whenever I wanted!  Tetsuya is his Mommy and Daddy's only kid, so they always pay attention to him.  I don't see why Mommy likes Miaka so much!  All she does is cry, eat, make a mess, and make smellies!  And Daddy is never home anymore, he stays at work really late, most of the time I'm asleep when he comes home.  And when he does come home earlier, him and Mommy are always yelling too much for him to pay attention to me!

I look out the window.  I wish G.I. Joe would drive up in their Jeep and take me on their adventures.  I wonder if Mom and Dad would even notice I was gone.  They might when they see me on TV with G.I Joe.  I wonder if G.I Joe knows the Transformers, I'd really like to meet Optimus Prime!  I bet no one ever ignores him!  He's so big and important and doesn't have a whiney sister to steal his Mommy's attention away.  All that yelling made me sleepy.  I might as well go to bed; I'm not getting any dinner anyway.

I climb into my bed.  I love my bed 'cause it has a cool He-man comforter.  He's also got a sister, She-ra, but she's pretty cool for a girl.  She doesn't cry, barf and poop like Miaka does!  He probably doesn't have to share a room with her either!  I look over at her stupid "big-girl" bed, with stupid My Little Pony, Blankets.  He-man's parents probably like him better because he's stronger. *Yawn! *  My eyes feel really heavy and I close them tight.  Maybe when I wake up, He-man will have taken my little sister away.  I laugh to myself, that would be the coolest.

**~*~*~**

BUMP! Something bumps into my bed and I open my eyes a bit.

"Jesus! You're gonna wake the other kid up! Be careful! Let's just grab the other one and get the fuck out of here!"

Wow! Is my wish coming true?  This is great!  That must be He-man and G.I. Joe taking my sister away so that Mommy and Daddy will love me again!  With the dim light coming from the window, I can see two men lifting my sleeping sister out of her dumb Pony bed.  I start to feel kinda scared.  Mom and Dad will miss Miaka, they really like her for some strange reason.  Maybe I should tell He-man I was just joking.  Yeah, as much as I hate Miaka…Mommy will cry forever if they take her away.  I decide I have to stop them and tell them it was a mistake.  I sit up in my bed.

"He-man…"

"Oh shit! The other kids awake! Chloroform him just like we did for the lil'Priestess here!"

The other man, who I think is Flint, comes over and quickly puts a cloth with something smelly on it on my mouth.  I tried to stop him, but he was real strong.

"Flint? He-man? Wh-…"

**~*~*~**

"OMIGOD! Where's my baby? Where's my baby? KEISUKE! Where's Miaka? Where's is she?"

Huh? What's going on?  Is that Mommy yelling?  

"…what's wrong, Mommy?" I said opening my eyes seeing her by Miaka's bed grasping at Miaka's silly comforter.

"Enough with this silly game! Where's your sister, Keisuke?"

…Miaka's missing?  I thought was just a dream!  He-man was here and I didn't get his autograph!?

"I didn't take her Mommy! He-man did!"

Mommy was crying, I knew she would. 

" I SAID ENOUGH WITH THE GAMES! WHERE IS YOUR SISTER?"

" I told you, He-man took her! And Flint was here too! I don't know where they went…"

Mommy came over and starts shaking me, it kinda hurt, and I was starting to get really scared.

"THIS ISN'T FUNNY KEISUKE! TELL ME WHERE MIAKA IS RIGHT NOW AND I PROMISE I WON'T PUNISH YOU!"

I start crying, too. "I don't know, Mommy!  They took her last night and wiped my face with a smelly cloth! I tried to stop them, I really did!  But Flint was too strong!"

"STOP LYING TO ME!"

"I'm not!" I can't look at Mommy's face; she looks like she might hit me.  I look at the ground, "Look! There's the stinky cloth right there!"

Mommy looks at the cloth on the ground and sniffs it quickly.

"Omigod…Miaka's been kidnapped!"  She runs out into the hallway.

"That's what I was telling you!  I'm sorry it was my fault! I told He-man to come! And G.I. Joe too! I'll tell 'um too bring Miaka back! I'M SORRY!"

But Mommy wasn't paying attention to me anymore, as usual. She had picked up the phone and dialed a short number into it.

"Hello? My babies been kidnapped!"

Uh, oh.  I think I'm really in trouble now! Thanks He-Man and Flint! 

TBC…

Shiro's Last Closing Thoughts: Wow! Lil'Miaka's been kidnapped! But, by who? Well, I know the answer, but your just gonna have to wait and see!  You probably think this fic is REALLY weird so far, but give me a chance here! This is gonna be a long one, with lots of twist and turns along the way! You're gonna wanna stick around!

Neko: Shiro-chan!

Shiro Yuki: *jumps* What?

Neko Kamiya: Stop sounding so full of your own writing skills!  Who do you think you are? J.K. Rowling?

Shiro Yuki: I'm sorry! I'm just really excited about this story!

Neko Kamiya: Liar! You're so full of shit!

Shiro Yuki: You're just jealous because I'm a much better fanfic writer!

Neko Kamiya: *starts laughing uncontrollably*

Shiro Yuki: Grrrrrrrrrrr….

PREISTESS IN PAMPERS AKUGI:

"Enough with this silly game! Where's your sister, Keisuke?"

…Miaka's missing?  I thought was just a dream!  He-man was here and I didn't get his autograph!?

"I didn't take her Mommy! He-man did!"

Mommy was crying, I knew she would. 

" I SAID ENOUGH WITH THE GAMES! WHERE IS YOUR SISTER?"

*cough*

"Huh? What was that sounded like it came from the closet…" Mommy ran over to the closet and opened it.

He-man and Flint were inside!

"Uh…sorry m'am, here's your baby! We thought the closet was the door!"

I run up to them, "Can I have your autograph?"

God that was a crappy Akugi…sorry! It'll be better next time!


	2. Tall Tails

DISCLAIMER:  I forgot to mention in the last chapter, but I don't own Pampers (the company! …or the product…well maybe at one point I did…o! Never mind!), GI Joe, Transformers, She-ra, My Little Ponies or He-man (though I'd like to own He-man, if I wasn't so POSITIVE he's gay!). Oh! And most importantly I don't own Fushigi Yuugi!  I am however looking at my Fushi poster right now. It's got a pretty pink background and BEAUTIFUL images on it of all my favourite characters (I really need to get the other half of it)! Neko-chan's got SO many posters…. I just got one…BUT IT'S IN A FRAME! Which makes it more special than any of Neko's posters * obvious jealousy considering Neko bought her one and only poster for her! * . 

SHIRO YUKI'S BEFORE STORY NOTES: I've just come to the realization I mention my sister WAY too much in my ramblings.  It must be because hardly any of my friends watch Anime (only, like, two!), and none of them write fan fiction!  I'm sort of in the Anime closet, no one knows of my secret PASSION *~shhhhhhh…it's a secret!~*  *sniff* It's kinda sad really!  That must be why I write fan fiction, so that I can find more people with my secret common interest.  Everyone would probably love Fushi if they knew about it, but alas, they'll probably never know! What the fuck am I talking about! I'm just procrastinating (as usual) with my silly sob story!  I must STUDY, STUDY, STUDY so I can go to a respectable University and make everyone PROUD! Shut up! No one cares! They're only here to read your fic! God! You gotta stop talking to yourself and rambling on about nothing! It's your New Years revolution (reminded of French Revolution test in MWC…wonder if I did okay on that!?)! *Bus full of all the FY character's runs Shiro over* TASUKI: "That'll shut her up!  Fuck, she's annoying!"   

CHANGES TO THE STORY! : I tried, and I can't do it! From now onwards this story will be written in past tense, not present tense! It's just too confusing for me to write the other way!  I know this is a MAJOR no-no to change tenses when you've already started the story (My English teacher would KILL me!), I hope it doesn't bug anyone!  If it does a thousand SORRY'S! I'm on my hands and knees begging you not to care about the tense change, and if you do, you can write me a LOOOOONG review about how much it pissed you off and I'll write you an even LOOOOOOOOOOONGER e-mail about how sorry I am! Happy? Good!  Let's get on with this, I love this chapter! (I'm not full of myself, just this story!)

Chapter 2: 

Tall "Tails" 

Narrated by: Keisuke

"Okay son, let's try this again, do you remember anything about the people who took your sister?"

"I told you already, Mr. Policeman, it was He-man and Flint!"

Mr. Policeman rubbed his teeth together and took another sip of the yucky water old people call coffee.  Mommy had called Daddy at work to tell him about Miaka being taken away.  He had come home and drove Mommy and me to the Police Station.  At first I thought it was really cool here!  I even saw a real gun!  One of the Police people let me wear their hat, but it was too big for me and made me feel silly.  Adults always treat kids like their stupid, but I'm pretty smart.  I already know how to read a few words and have finished the book, "See Spot Run". 

The Policeman had been asking me questions about what happened last night for one whole hour! I was getting really tired of him getting angry with me for telling the truth!  It's true that sometimes I tell a lie if it will get me out of trouble, but I didn't do anything wrong this time.  Well…except asking GI Joe and He-man to come take my sister away.  But, she asked for it by stealing away all Mommy's time! 

"Alright son, if you won't cooperate with me, I'm going to have to call your parents in here!"

The mean Mr. Policeman opened the door and brought my Mommy and Daddy in from the hallway.  Mommy's face was all streaky and red, and Daddy had his arm around her.  I smiled.  I hadn't seen Daddy being nice to Mommy in a very long time.  But, my smile quickly left my face when I saw how Mommy was looking at me.  The Policeman had told her I was being a bad boy and if they wanted to get anything out of me, they'd have to talk me into it.  Ew…get something out of me?  I don't want them to cut me open! I saw it once on the Learning Channel, it was really icky.  

"Keisuke! You have to answer the nice Policeman's questions honestly!  Your sister could be in a lot of danger!  She could even be killed! Do you understand, Keisuke?  The only way to find her is to find out who has her!  If you know anything, you have to tell the police!  Aren't you worried about your sister?  Don't you realize how upset your father and I are?  I know this is hard on you sweetie, but I need you to be a big boy for us, and talk to the nice Policeman about last night!"  Mommy said, looking like she might start crying again.  I didn't want her to, seeing Mommy cry made me want to cry to! I wouldn't look like a big boy if I started blubbering like a baby!  

"I did!" I yelled at Mommy, "I told the policeman everything I remember! He-man and Flint took Miaka! They said a few words you told me never to say.  And He-man said something about Jesus and a Priest; I guess he's Catholic or something.  I tried to tell He-man…"

"STOP IT! Keisuke, I can't believe this!" Daddy yelled, "Look at your Mother! Look at how much pain she's in! And what do you do? Spout off tall tales about cartoon characters?  This is totally inappropriate, young man!  I want you to apologize to your mother and the policeman right now and tell us the truth!"

"He-man doesn't have a tail!  And you'd know that if you were home enough to play with me!"" I yelled back at him.  I was really surprised.  The words came out of my mouth before I even thought about what I was saying.  Daddy was about to get really angry.

"Could you stop thinking about yourself for one second?  Right now all that matters is getting your sister back!  When I was your age I never would have disrespected my father by yelling at him! And I certainly would never lie to the authorities when my parents were counting on me to help my sister!  I have a good mind to…"

Daddy was moving closer to me with his hand in a fist.  I'd never seen him this angry before! Was he really going to hit me?

"SIR! Sir!  You need to calm down! This isn't helping anything! Let's just give Keisuke a second to think about what he's doing, while you and your wife come out to the desk to sign some papers."

The door shut and I was left by myself in the dark little room.  I can't believe that now that Miaka is gone, all they can think about is where Miaka is!  When she was with us, all they cared about was her, and now that she's gone they still only care about her!  Daddy was actually gonna hit me because I wasn't helping them find her, even though I was trying! 

I couldn't take this anymore! I needed to get out and fast! They were going to be back soon.  I looked around they room for a way out.  Bingo!  The window!  Luckily, we were still on the ground level of the Police Station.  I slid open the window and swung one foot outside.  Before going all the way, I took one last look inside.  Goodbye Mommy and Daddy!  Maybe one day He-man and Flint will come back with Miaka and you'll be happy! I swung my other leg out the window and ran down the street.

**~*~*~**

Brrrrr…I was getting really cold as the sun was going down.  I'd been walking around downtown all day long.  I was getting really tired, and the darker it was getting the scarier things seemed.  I looked around.  Everyone was going into apartment buildings I didn't recognize and having dinner at restaurants I'd never seen before.  I was lost!  I'd never been away from Mommy before! I wonder if they even noticed I'd left, and if they did, I wonder if they cared!

Gurgle…gurgle…grumble…my tummy was making funny noises again!  I hadn't eaten anything since breakfast at the police station!  All I'd had was a cinnamon donut!  I don't think you can get free food anywhere, but I never had to think about that before, Mommy used to always make sure I had food.  I was really starting to miss her!  No, wait, Mommy didn't always make sure I had food!  Yesterday I wanted Jello and she wouldn't get it for me! Then she made me go to bed without dinner!  I couldn't go home now!  I wasn't wanted there anyway!  Besides, even if I wanted to go home…I have no idea where home is! I'm lost!

The air was getting colder and I wished I'd brought a jacket! Next time I run away from home, I gotta be more prepared. ***Sniff* my nose was starting to run.  Mommy always kept tissue in her purse in case Miaka or me got the sniffles.  I wiped my nose on my sleeve.  I don't need a tissue! I'm a big boy now; I can get by just fine without Mommy or Daddy. Gurgle…gurgle…grumble…. BE QUIET TUMMY!  **

As I walked along, I spotted a McDonalds.  I shoved my face up to the glass and looked in.  A bunch of families were in there having dinner.  I remember before Miaka was born, Mommy and Daddy and me would come to a McDonalds and have hamburgers.  We were so happy together.  I really wish I had a hamburger right now, all this walking and being lost had made me REALLY hungry!  A girl in the McDonalds, with red hair in pigtails and who looked a bit older than me, saw me in the window.  She stuck two of her fries in her mouth like fangs and made a funny face at me.  I laughed, but then her mother scolded her and turned her away from the window.  Suddenly, I was all alone again.      

When I turned away from the McDonalds the sun had almost set.  Where was I going to sleep tonight?  I've never slept anywhere but my bed at home, except for this one time when Mommy and Daddy took Miaka and me on one of Daddy's business trips.  I got to stay in a hotel and get room service.  Mommy ordered us all banana splits, except for Miaka who got a milkshake because she didn't have any teeth.  I don't think hotels are free, because I saw Mommy give her money card to the man at the counter.  Mommy said that a money card is a fast way to give money to people without having to carry real money around.  I don't have a money card and don't know where you get one.

Maybe running away from Mommy and Daddy wasn't such a good idea.  I never knew looking after yourself was so hard.  I'd go back home, but I don't know where that is!  No one even seems to notice me out here!  Shouldn't Mommy and Daddy have come looking for me?  I guess they're still too busy looking for Miaka to look for me yet.  

Wait…is that?  At the end of the street I saw a man wearing my Daddy's coat. It had to be him, I knew he cared about me!  He's out looking for me!   

"Daddy!"  I ran up to my Daddy and hugged his leg, "I'm sorry I ra…" I looked up, that wasn't my Daddy.  The man who's leg I was hugging was looking down at me with a confused look on his face. 

He gently unwrapped my arms from his leg and said, "I'm sorry little guy, I'm not your Daddy, are you lost?"

The man who was wearing my Daddy's coat had funny blue hair and was kinda dirty.  His jeans had a whole in them and the zipper on his jacket looked like it was broken.  I had seen people like him before, Mommy told me they were 'bums', but I didn't really understand that. They didn't look like bums; they looked like people to me.  Mommy had also told me never to talk to strangers, but this stranger was asking me a question.  Mommy said that it's rude not to answer your elders, and this stranger was older than I was. Gosh, Mommy says a lot of confusing things.

The stranger bum repeated, "Are you lost?"

I looked up at him, I should probably be scared of him, but he seemed really nice.  He reminded me of this song I heard at school "When Irish Eyes are Smiling", because he seemed to be smiling at me with his eyes.

"Um…are you Irish?" I asked curiously.

"No, I'm not Irish," he laughed, "I'm Houjun.  What's your name?"  

"I'm Keisuke.  I'm 6 years old.  Um…do you have any food?  I like Jello!"

Houjun looked like he was trying not to laugh at me, it kinda hurt my feeling that he wasn't taking me seriously.  I was 6 years old, practically a teenager!

"No…I don't have any Jello." He said smiling with both his eyes and his mouth, "Where are your parents?"

I didn't want Houjun to think I was a baby.  Miaka was a baby who needed to be taken care of; I was a big boy who could look after himself! "Oh…I've moved out from my Mommy's and Daddy's home.  They don't want me there anymore."

Houjun gave me a funny look and then said, "So, where do you live now, Keisuke?"

Ummm…had to think fast, "Oh, I live…over there!" I said pointing at the McDonalds.

Houjun gave me that funny look again, "Really? You live with Ronald McDonald?"

I gave up; this lie was not as believable as I first thought it would be. "No," I said, "I actually don't know where I'm gonna live yet.  I would like to live at McDonalds though!"

Houjun bent down so he was looking me in the eyes and put his hand on my shoulder, "Listen, Keisuke, I bet your parents are very worried about you, I think we should try to find them.  Where is the last place you saw them?"

"I'm not going back with them!" I said angrily to Houjun, "They don't want me around anymore!  All they care about is stupid, smelly, spoiled Miaka!"

"Mi-Miaka?"  He said looking confused, "Who's Miaka?"

T.B.C…J

**Shiro's Closing Thoughts: Wow! Writing like a 6-year-old is harder than I thought it would be!  Everything he says I have to think, "Is that too young for a 6 year old?  Would he know that word?"  But, at the same time it's kinda fun!  Sorry if any readers are enjoying this being narrated by Lil'Keisuke, because next chapter HOUJUN TAKES OVER!  Well…not everything, just the narration.  I hope people won't be upset that I made Houjun a bum (Neko-chan hot angry at me), but I think you won't mind it as much as the story progresses!**

**Chichiri: "Shiro-chan…why am I a bum? Haven't I had enough problems in past lives, no da?"    **

**Shiro Yuki: "Um…history has a way of repeating itself! Gotta go!" * runs off at lightning speed ***

**Chichiri: * settles down with a can of beans * " * gloom * I guess it's not so bad…* sigh *."**

**TALL "TAILS" AKUGI #1:**

I slid open the window and swung one foot outside.  Before going all the way, I took one last look inside.  

**Keisuke: "Goodbye Mommy and Daddy!  Maybe one day He-man and Flint will come back with Miaka and you'll be happy!" **

I swung my other leg out the window.

***SPLAT***

**Dead Keisuke: "Aw, Nuts! I forgot we took the elevator up 6 levels!" **

**TALL "TAILS" AKUGI #2:**

I looked up at him, I should probably be scared of him, but he seemed really nice.  He reminded me of this song I heard at school "When Irish Eyes are Smiling", because he seemed to be smiling at me with his eyes.

**Keisuke: "Um…are you Irish?" **

**Houjun: "Ay, I've a bit o' Irish in me, I do!" * Starts doing Irish gig in the street * **

 * People start to throw money and a leprechaun playing "When Irish Eyes are smiling" on an accordion appears. *

**Leprechaun: "Must be the luck o' the Irish!"**

Hope no one's offended by that last Akugi, I'm part Irish, so it's ok to poke fun at myself…I think! C U Next chapter!


End file.
